WARNING: This post contains very, very, VERY strange material. This is how our conversations go down usually. I just had to share this with someone!
Julie
its like the funniest thing ive ever seen
give it up
me
seriously? its not that funny. really adorable and true, but no THAT funny
especially for someone who's feeling like a pile of soggy garbage on a monday morning....
not to rain on you parade or anything 
Julie
im flipping u off
in my mind
ur so hard to please
me
im packing you away and shipping you to china for doing that
in my mind
Julie
im seding a mean guy from china to find u and kill you
me
im turning him and shipping him back trained in karate to teach you a lesson
for trying to mess with me
Julie
ut lame
me
oh!
Julie
come up with something better
me
whatever
fine... i hired the russian mafia to take out your guy
Julie
but u didnt excpect this so he came at night and snatched u
you didnt have time to hire anyone
me
i sleep with one eye open
Julie
u didnt think id be that evil
me
so im always prepared
Julie
listen its obviously just u against my man
deal with it okay?
let him kill u quietly
me
the mafia got to him before he could do anything.
deal with the fact that your guy failed
Julie
fine so my man is down. im very angry and ruthless. i went on down and traiend and became a proffesional karate girl and now its between ME AND YOU
take it like a man
me
im not a man... so i hire a man to do it for me
Julie
and obviosly your man got nothing on me so i take him down
NOW its between me and u
me
but little do you know im a ninja!!!
so you can't find me!
Julie
okay so u hid from me?
okay i went back to china
me
and i followed you and jumped you in the night
Julie
but ofcorse my powers > your powers
so i throw u off the bridge
me
oooooh! so now we're using our mighty math skills!
Julie
and u suffocate but not die yet
me
how can i suffocate from being thrown off a bidge?
Julie
u get rescued by a fisheman
me
that makes no sense
Julie
U JUST DO
me
NO
I REFUSE
Julie
IM OLDER
me
YOULL DIE SOONER
Julie
YOU ALREADY DIED!
me
NO I DIDNT
I HAVE TO MUCH WILL POWER TO DIE
and besides the mafia is on my side and they've got my back
i got a floaty boat
Julie
chinese mafia > russian mafia we all know
jackie chan is on my side
take that
WIN
me
welll i called up chuck norris and eveyone knows chuck> jackie
10:47 AM
Julie
i literly asked the people in lab right now who they like more chuck or jackie
80 percent jackei
whatcha got now?
me
your statistics are false... there's only nerds in that lab who dont know anything
so i moved away to italy and then i called my psychiatric after i realized we were trying to kill each other over me not thinking a photo was as funny as you did
Julie
LOL
i love you
me
i love you too
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